Even if a manager should speak mainly through his actions, his words directed to employees are very important, too. That is what Jeff Haden, a popular author of management tips, writes about on Ceo.com. He summarized several phrases a manager should not say to his subordinates.
"That's great, but ..."
If you want to praise your subordinate for a good idea, praise him. Then you can ask specific questions, but don't mention "great" and "but" in the same sentence. And don't even argue with the sentence, "I am the boss." The final decision will be up to you, but that doesn't mean that you should make an open discussion impossible from your position of authority.
"I have found a great opportunity for you."
There is no need for the truly great opportunities to be advertised. When employees hear this phrase, they usually expect an unpleasant task or some extra work. He gets the impression that you have to promote something to force him to do it.
"I am really happy of the last success of mine."
If you think that repeatedly talking about a success you present as your own will get your employees motivated, think again. They will, on the contrary, miss your recognition of their hard work.
"It was too much for me today."
Don't expect your subordinates to automatically understand your workload and stress. If you want to talk about difficult days, talk about how working together with your team helps you overcome it. Do not point out to yourself, but to your team.
In addition to the phrases above, be also careful how you are using the words "no" and "we." Every time you refuse something, explain it. Don't just say "no" and period. As far as "we", use this word often, but not to hide your own missteps.
-kk-