When you think you are better than others and you follow your goals and do not lack self-confidence, it is much more likely you will go quite far in your career progression.
This was the not-very-startling conclusion of a university study carried out by the University of Nebraska and the University of Illinois and was discussed in a recent article by Fast Company. The article said that people who tend to behave with a certain degree of superiority are much more likely to be leaders rather than people who behave normally.
Therefore, whether you already have suspected for some time that your boss or another manager is a narcissist, you are probably right. One of the many specific characteristics of a narcissist is the need to feel power and influence, and therefore naturally seeks the attention of their colleagues or subordinates. According to Nebraska professor of management Peter Harms, narcissism is most evident in the spectrum where on one side you have people who are paralyzed by self-doubt, while the other side is dominated by "self-worshipers". Craig Malkin, a clinical psychologist at Harvard Medical School, identified several ways to easily recognize a narcissist in the team.
1. Uncertainty is not their problem...
...but yours. According Malkin, narcissists are very pleased to toss a hot potato in the form of a feeling of smallness to their subordinates." Narcissists say and do things, subtle or obvious, that make you feel less smart, less accomplished, less competent," he says.
2. He avoids expressions of emotion
Expression of feelings or favor can be expressed simply by a touch, hug or pat on the shoulders by a friend, colleague or partner. This gesture, however, is also a manifestation of influence and thus a disruption of perfect narcissist autonomy. And it is certainly not pleasant.
3. They have to have everything under control
The need to control the state of things is related to the need to have an impact on others and feel independent. Therefore, a total narcissist simply does not like it when someone else tries to share or take part of the control belonging to him. Rather than express his needs, tries to maneuver people to suit him.
This is very similar to the situation when the husband comes home from work and dinner is not ready. At that moment, he lashes out at his wife, due to his inability to admit that food preparation is something he would rather avoid himself.
Do you have a hundred-percent narcissist in your team? According to experts, it is best to play by their rules as long as you need to, and then gracefully dance away. What are your experiences?
-bn-