Ask questions, listen and empathise with your subordinates. This, put succinctly, is the essence of the coaching approach to managing employees. Managers are no longer expected to know all the answers and slavishly tell their employees what to do. The coaching way is more inspiring and helps employees develop. It teaches them to think things over and come up with their own ideas.
There is no one single guide to becoming a good coach to your subordinates; every manager has to find their own style. Even so, three steps you can use to start with were published on the Harvard Business Review website.
1. Ask
First of all, you should give your staff enough space to express themselves. Open-ended questions will help you. If, for example, you are going to discuss a few issues from the last few days with a member of your team, just say: "Well, where would you like to start?" That will show you are ready to listen and let the employee talk about what is important from their point of view.
2. Listen
Hearing and listening are not the same thing. We hear people talking, somehow interpret their words and understand them in a certain way. When, however, we listen, both our body and mind do everything possible to make the other person feel they are being heard. In coaching, listening is strongly connected to maintaining eye contact. This does not mean looking into each other's eyes continuously - just more often than in everyday communication. You should also devote your full attention to the employee, postponing all other activities and distractions. The manager can make brief notes but not to such an extent that the employee feels threatened by it.
3. Show empathy
Empathy means understanding other people's positions as well as emotions. It is essential for the employee to get rid of feelings of embarrassment or shame in order to think creatively about possible solutions. So when employees talk with you about a problem, you should beware of making them feel your problems are bigger than theirs or trying to comfort them with a phrase like: "Take it more easy." Do not focus on finding solutions before you have shown you understand the feelings of the individual concerned. However, keep in mind that empathy is not an excuse for poor performance but an important first step towards finding the best possible solutions.
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