One of your subordinates has such bad hygienic habits that others refuse to share the workplace with him. If your clients could see him, they would not want to talk with him even on phone. Another employee is currently experiencing a difficult situation in his private life and nobody knows how to behave around him. Then there is an employee you have to dismiss for incompetence. Somebody keeps on stealing soap and toilet paper from your restrooms ... These are just a few examples of tricky situations a manager has to deal with. No matter how uncomfortable the situation is, the biggest mistake is to say nothing and let the tensions grow.
Practical tips on how to face even the most tricky situations directly were described in a recent article on Inc.com written by Amy Morin, an experienced psychotherapist. She based the article on her book titled, 13 Things Mentally Strong Peope Don't Do. The book has been translated into 21 languages, including Czech (13 věcí, které psychicky silní lidé nedělají, Bizbooks, 2015).
1. Prepare
If possible, prepare in advance what you want to say about the situation. Remember that if you say nothing, you will only add to the atmosphere of fear and other negative emotions in your team.
2. Solve the issue privately
Ask the person to meet you face to face in a place where nobody else can hear you. If somebody opens the tricky issue in a public place, such as in the hallway, clearly say that you will solve it elsewhere.
3. Sit on it
When dealing with an uncomfortable issue, it is always better to sit than stand. However, both of you have to sit. You have to be at the same level so that you do not speak to the employee from above. If only one chair is available, both of you should stand.
4. Emphasize that it is a tricky issue
You should not immediately say that e.g. the employee smells. First you should say that you want to talk about a somewhat delicate issue. The employee will then have some time to prepare for the discussion emotionally.
5. Do not ignore your uncomfortable feelings
When you avoid eye contact, nervously shake your body or play with things on the table, you will only emphasize your nervousness. It is better to openly let the employee know you find the situation a little uncomfortable.
6. Be polite, but speak clearly
The employee should clearly understand what you are saying. Indirect communication and signals only lead to greater confusion.
7. Expect emotions
Give the employee some space to absorb your message. Listen to him and answer possible questions. Expect embarrassment, fear, sadness and also anger. However, you have to remain calm.
8. Clearly close the conversation
Be careful not to end your tricky conversation by an embarrassing silence that does not signal to the employee whether it is over and what will happen next. Clearly state that the discussion is closed and possibly repeat what steps you expect the employee to take.
What was the most embarrassing employee-related situation you had to deal with?
-kk-