Start by explaining that you are going to share your criticism because you have high expectations, but you know that the person can meet them. In doing so, you will gain the person's trust by showing you want to help. Your feedback will then not be perceived as an attack.
People should not feel inferior after receiving your feedback. You should therefore briefly mention that you yourself have already learned a lot from feedback and always welcome it. Be open to any observations of the other party to your own behavior.
Ask permission by saying, for example: "I noticed a few things and I wonder whether you would be interested in some feedback." Most people will respond positively. Moreover, they will be less defensive because they have the feeling that they decided to hear the feedback themselves.
Be careful not to share your feedback as a monologue. First, describe what problematic issue you want to discuss and how you think the issue could be managed better. Then ask the other person for his opinion and suggestions.
Adam Grant is the youngest professor at the Wharton School, University of Pennsylvania, where he focuses on organizational and managerial psychology. He regularly publishes articles in professional journals and has won numerous awards for research in his field. He became world-renowned after publishing the book entitled Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success which was on the bestseller lists in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal as one of the best books in the field of management and business recommended by the prestigious magazines Fortune or Harvard Business Review. The book was published in 32 languages, including Czech (Dávat a brát, BizBooks, 2013). In February 2016, Grant published his second book entitled Originals: How Non-conformists Move the World.
GRANT ADAM: Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success. New York: Penguin Books, 2013. 320 p.
GRANT, ADAM: Dávat a brát: Skrytá dynamika úspěchu, Praha: BizBooks, 2013. 312 p.
GRANT ADAM: Originals: How Non-conformists Move the World. New York: Penguin Books, 2016. 336 p.
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