An article on the website of the INSEAD business school tells a story on this topic.
A woman called Lucy was a top performer and had achieved a number of successes for herself and the whole team. Relations with her team members were positive, as were relations with her boss. Nevertheless, the main feeling Lucy had was one of peculiar dissatisfaction.
A turning point in Lucy's story was a remark made by one of her close friends, who pointed out that Lucy's boss sounded like her sister. And indeed, there were some important similarities.
The same role at home and at work
The older sister often used to get her way in family discussions (where to eat or what movie to watch). Lucy usually complied for the sake of harmony, which was deemed very important in the family.
Generally, there were many happy memories with her sister that Lucy could recall. But still her sister clearly played the dominant role in the relationship: Lucy was the subordinate younger sibling. And the relationship with her boss was very similar to this.
Lucy generally liked her boss but she couldn’t make her voice heard. She wanted to be a high-achiever, much like her boss and her older sister. In both relationships, she ended up suppressing her own assertiveness. She was useful to have around but, again, she subordinated herself for the sake of group harmony.
Are you a similar type of person? What did Lucy do and what should you do for yourself? This will be in the second part of the article.
-jk-