In order to find a path to the successful resolution of a conflict you need to know what both parties want and what their interests and positions are. And as almost every situation can be affected by excessively strong emotions, here are some tips on how to conduct a discussion so that it will not be thus disrupted:
1. Let both sides be heard
Emotions can often create a strong barrier between two people who are counterparts in a conflict. Then the conflict cannot be effectively resolved until this barrier has been broken down. Sometimes it helps to listen carefully to both sides and then at a certain point begin to guide them towards a mutually possible solution. You need both sides to agree with such a proposed solution.
2. Stay neutral and positive
You must stay neutral. Don’t get drawn into the argument because the parties involved will trust you only if you act as a neutral moderator. Their trust is invaluable because without it you will be unable to guide them to a solution. Also stay positive throughout every session. Assure the parties that you are there to help them find a successful solution.
3. Active listening
You have to set aside your own biases and judgments. Demonstrate that you are engaged in the situation and ask relevant questions. Don’t use why questions since these can easily escalate emotions; instead, rephrase - because only then can you be sure that you understand correctly what has been said. Then reframe in such a way as to remove emotional content.
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