Managers often make mistakes in how they try to help their subordinates overcome self-doubt. They think that by encouraging their people and telling them they can do it, they are on the right track. Telling employees that you trust them and that you wouldn't give them the tasks if you had doubts about their abilities sounds like a good idea. However, it's not enough, according to an interesting article on the Harvard Business Review website.
Coaches call the process of having doubts about your abilities, while others are telling you the opposite, "arguing with the inner critic." These arguments don't make sense for at least two reasons. The first reason is the instinctive nature of the inner critic. The inner critic won't let us believe people who tell us that we can do something when we feel that we can't. It can even make us feel more worried that others don't understand us. The second reason is the absence of a tool to help us overcome these doubts.
Instead of arguing with your employees' inner critics, you should move your conversations to the next level. Talk to them about how doubting their abilities not only affects their individual performance, but the results of the entire team as well. Then offer them specific tools to help them get rid of their doubts.
1. Explain what the "inner critic" is
Talk with your subordinates about the fact that our inner voice doesn't reflect realistic thinking, but irrational doubts about our abilities. While the inner critic can only see problems, a rationally thinking person looks for solutions.
2. Look for ways to win over the inner critic
Tell your people that you realize that new tasks and roles may cause doubts. The degree of their success, however, doesn't depend on how much they trust their abilities, but on how they can manage and overcome their doubts. Teach them to speak about their doubts out loud and think of ways to overcome them. Take the next steps towards more rational thinking together.
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