Everyone wants to be heard first, which makes it pretty hard for listening to occur. Without proper listening, people make assumptions and create misunderstandings. These cause errors, ineffective decisions and costly mistakes. On a personal level feelings are hurt and cohesion of the team is weakened. As a result trust and communication is damaged as well as money wasted.
Getting past the obstacles
There are some obstacles that people need to overcome. People fear that:
- it will be perceived as agreement, even if no agreement exists
- they'll learn that their own perspective was incomplete
- their own viewpoint will not be heard
Listening is more than just hearing, it is about fully understanding the point of view of another person. Hearing is passive, listening requires an active choice to accept that other perspectives have value. Through true listening you can see a bigger picture and make better decisions. Use the two steps proposed by the management-issues.com website.
1) Focus on the other person
Start by focusing totally on the other person. Make good eye contact and halt all unnecessary activity. Put your opinions aside for a moment – you can share them later. Tune into the other person's body language. Ask yourself how the person is feeling, frustrated, concerned, happy or disappointed? Is he describing a problem or offering a solution or expecting a particular action? Strive to understand more than the person's words.
2) Seek confirmation on what you perceived
Verify your perceptions by getting confirmation from the other person. Be inquisitive, ask for clarification to determine if your estimate was right or wrong. You must be able to briefly sum up the other person's point of view to his satisfaction. That’s how you know true listening has occurred.
-jk-